Friday, May 14, 2010

Taz Talks -- More Funner

Hey Dudes and Dudettes! Mama says that she is thinking about a post on punishment, but she's not ready yet, so I can write this time. My topic is better. My topic for today is More Funner.

I will explain. I have a theme song. (Everyone should have a theme song!) Mine is "Tervs Just Wanna Have Fun." Actually, I think the lady originally sang it about Girls, not Tervs, but I'm not a girl, and I am a Terv (that's short for Belgian Tervuren), so it works better this way.

Tervs just wanna have fun. Dogs in general, really. People spend their time working and doing laundry and shopping for groceries and vacuuming and whatever, and when they have a bit of time left over, they figure that is their time for fun. Which they usually squander watching something stupid on the television -- although television can be an excellent way to keep people still for snuggling pets, which is, of course, crucial.

Dogs, on the other hand, are all about the fun (and napping). Yes, there are working dogs, with real, important jobs. But hel-LO! Check out the drug detection and search and rescue dogs -- big game of hide and seek, with games and prizes when you find what you're after. Herding sheep? Funnest game on the whole entire planet, no exceptions. K9 officers taking down bad guys? BAM! Human tug toy. Wicked awesome. Mostly dog jobs are a big ol' fun fest.

Now, I'm not saying that people jobs are necessarily the same way. Don't go all "following your bliss-y" and neglect to shop for dog food. But hey, why not make things More Funner? That's my point. With a little creativity, even the annoying stuff can maybe be More Funner.

For instance, Mama is always fighting with Mattea, the kid, over what stuff she should be eating. Mattea says that she never gets anything good to eat. Mama says that Mattea wants to eat nothing but junk food, and that bodies need protein and vegetables and not just empty carbs. (I'm not sure what empty carbs are. I am familiar with empty cartons, which are a whole lot of fun, but this is apparently not what she is talking about.) So a couple of days ago Mama made Chex Mix like stuff with the whole wheat cereal that isn't Chex because it's cheaper, and peanuts and almonds and some cheese crackers and spices and parmesan cheese and all of a sudden it's Party in a Bag for snack. Apparently it still has some empty carbs in it, but not all sugar and chemicals and stuff, and me and Coretta got to taste it and boy howdy is that stuff crunchy and delicious. Way More Funner than arguing about healthy snacks, but not so far off from healthy after all.

You want more kid examples? Unlike me, Mattea does not like to get up early in the morning. And she does not like people telling her to get up for school, but she also ignores the alarm clock. The other day Mama went in and sang to her the chorus from this old song:
Hal-an-tow, jolly lum-a-low
We were up
Long before the day-o
To welcome in the summer,
To welcome in the May-o.
For summer is a comin' in
And winter's gone away-o.

Mattea thought that was More Funner than just being told to get up for school. Now Mama sings the song this way:
Hal-an-tow, jolly buffalo
They were up
Long before the day-o
To welcome in the mustard,
To welcome in the May-o.
For buffalo are comin' in
So you better get out of the way-o.

Which is More Funner still. One more kid example. The other day Mattea was super mad about something, and told Mama that she wanted to hit her with something. So Mama got pillows out of the closet, and they both whammed on each other with pillows until Mattea was laughing and not mad. Personally, I found the sight of my people whacking each other a bit disturbing, but I guess the pillows turned out to be way More Funner than Tea yelling and Mama going on about Responsibilities and Self Control.

I think that if people want to make changes in their lives that they should find creative ways to make their lives More Funner. I will give you a hint. Stuff that you do with dogs is More Funner than stuff where dogs stay home and have a nap.

Wags and kisses,


  1. Stuff with food for me is even way more funner than anything.

    Love, Cici

  2. Food is always way fun. But it turns out that there are a wide variety of other things that are also enjoyable to chew on. Like cats. And poodles. Just kidding. Ha ha.

  3. Also things with squeakers are really great. But I don't like it when you or Emma chew on me. Retta's always nice to me though.


  4. Retta's always nice to everyone. She can't help it. She had a sore on her neck, and Mama put a T-shirt on her to keep her from scratching it. It was from Starr King School and the front said "What will you do with your gifts?" and the back said "Choose to bless the world" and Mama says that's what Retta just does all the time is choose to bless the world cause that's just who she is. Mama says that I am a good dog, mostly.